Monday, February 25, 2008

Please Try Again (Rough Pitch)


Here is a rough pitch for my film "Please Try Again". It is going to be entered into a contest on Friday at which point I will be asking you ALL to exercise your right to vote and tell everyone you know to do the same. In the meantime, let me know what you think of it; I am mostly concerned about the dialog. I will be adding images and what not to it tomorrow.

Thanks,
Benjamin

2 comments:

JT said...

Sounds interesting...can't wait to see more.

The CDP. said...

The pitch is good. I don't exactly know what the guidelines are for these clips, but if possible, I'd find a way to touch upon the mood of the screenplay (it's not sci-fi, it's a drama with elements of romance and comedy), the potential target audience (12-29), and the flashback, flash-forward nature of the screenplay.

Truly, it looks good as is, though. You're on the right path, and even though I've already read (and loved to death) the screenplay, I'm still intrigued by the idea of seeing it become a film, as your pitch succeeds fully in being intriguing.

I'd love to see your latest draft. If you need any help or want to brainstorm, you know I'll do everything I can to assist.